A few simple words or differences in opinion can create a war between the two. sometimes the things we fight about will be silly, things that no one cares about.
” Discussion is always better than arguments because an argument is to find out who is right and a discussion is to find out what is right “
Fights are never the answer , fighting with someone you love is much worse. It could ruin your whole day it doesn’t matter how small or big the fight is about . Some of them never gives up the fight even if they no that you were right they just can’t put their huge egos down .
So here are somethings I do when I get into a bad fight .
Don’t take actions immediately after the fight
” Anger doesn’t solve anything. It builds nothing, but it can destroy everything. ”
Anger controls most of us than us controlling it. anger in my opinion is the most dangerous feeling to ever exist. when we are angry, most of us have no control over our words or actions, which can create more problems than we can imagine.
The first and foremost rule in mending a relationship, never take actions to mend it immediately after the fight, it will create more chaos. give the other person time to calm, to think rationally without anger getting in their way, and take time to calm yourselves.
After the fight calm your self down or else your anger towards them increases and creates a chance for another fight when you meet them again. Calming ourselves can be done in different methods, the easiest one is to listen to music, or engage in any other hobbies of yours. Channel the rage you are feeling towards something else.
It is a well-known fact that the best of our works come out after heightened emotions. Songs after breakups are always good. So channel your rage to something you love instead of someone, which may cause another fight or increase in your rage.
If calming down with anything doesn’t work distract yourself. You can do anything even binge-watching or stress eating or even sleeping sounds good. Sleeping is a good method, after a sleep we probably won’t remember about the fight, at least for sometimes. Just keep the thought of the fight out of your mind and relax. Do meditation or something. Just relax. If we are raging with anger, they won. Just calm yourself.
Talk to someone or write about this incident
Talking is a good way to stop yourself from hating the person too much. If we keep our thoughts to ourselves it only going to grow into a rage monster which will even make us do irrational things. Sharing doesn’t mean it has to be with a person, you can even write down it in your journal. But if we don’t do this it may result in us doing something that we will regret later .the person you share with can be your loved ones, your close friends, your psychologist even a stranger you met on the internet. Just let it all out.
Reconsider your role in the fight
This is a key factor in solving any fight, after calming yourself, just rethink about the incident, what was the fight about? Whose fault was it? Was it because of you ? . Reconsider your role in the fight, think if it was your mistake or there. If it was yours admit it to yourself, just understand that we are human, not god, we will make mistakes.
Apologize if it was your mistake
If it was because of you the fight got worse. Just think about it. The person who stands in their opinion even if it was wrong is not the stronger one, the one who understands their mistakes and correct them, are the strongest. And it’s ok to let your ego down one in a while. So apologize to them.
If it is not your fault, just understand the other person is human too. Sometimes they can’t get your level of thinking about something that might be the reason why the person different opinions.
So this is what I do when I get into a gift with anyone , especially my loved ones
Things to keep in mind when you have a fight
it is okay to let your ego down
The major reason for any argument is that no one is ready to let their ego down. arguments are usually started due to a clash of egos. so just keep in mind it is ok to let your ego down for the sake of peace.
if you are wrong admit it
this is an important aspect for our whole life . when we are proven wrong, don’t hang to your argument till they quit. it can ruin your relationship with this person. and is not a good thing to do.
we are all humans
Always keep in mind, that we all are human, god is the only one who doesn’t make mistakes. so human makes mistakes too, so when an argument always keeps this in mind and forgive the other person if it is their mistake. forgiveness is the best thing in the whole world.
everyone has a different opinion
Every person existing in this world is unique in one way or another, so there is a chance of someone having a different opinion from you. it may lead to many arguments. so when you argue with someone for this reason, always keep this in your mind and approach them in a civil way.
so these are the method I adopt to mend my relationship with someone after a really bad argument, hope it works for you too.
related post: how to stay positive